Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Randomize