Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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