you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
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