Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
