I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
im holly from the hills drunk
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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