I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
