operation have a gay friend backfired
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
