There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
