Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Randomize
