remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
time to smoke my breakfast
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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