His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize
