The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
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