He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
