so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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