I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
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