Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Randomize
