Say something about gay babies.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
