he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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