I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
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