Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
