I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
