dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Randomize
