this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Randomize
