We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
