Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
