I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
