just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
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