Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
wow bdsm is so cute
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
