i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
