A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize