i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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