the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Randomize