And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Randomize
