She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Randomize
