Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
