i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
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