I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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