i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
