she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Randomize
