Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
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