he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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