If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
Randomize
