she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize