in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Randomize
