with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
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