do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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