Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Randomize
