Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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