it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
one two three fourrrrnication!
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
dude. I can hear the air.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
