Heybabeimwearingurpanties
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
